Can I get this colorway in another base?
No. Maybe? I can’t tell the future. If it’s here you can buy it. If not, maybe complain on the internet, that seems to work for people.

Can I pre-order / subscribe / get a gift card / hold some vague responsibility over your head?
No, the general guilt and uneasiness of owing things to randos on the internet is one of the things that drove us to do this in the first place. What you see is what you get. We all have enough deadlines in our lives.

What if I fall madly in love with a yarn/fiber/colorway, will I ever be able to get it again?
No, so I guess you better buy it all now huh?

I ordered something but then got an email that it can’t be delivered, what gives?
Shit happens, we are human, and some of us can’t count very well. Don’t worry, you either get your product or your money back and the only thing you will have lost is your innocence (and honestly, if you still have that, what the fuck are you doing here? You know what, consider that our gift to you…taking your innocence.)

Wait, you are never doing this fiber/colorway/yarn again?
Yup, this is more of an art project than a solid business plan. Then again, complaining on the internet about things seems to work really well. Why not write a petition?

You are amazing! We love you! Thanks for doing this!
Well, that’s not a question, but thanks? One of our parents seem to think so too (but not the other one, we can never seem to make them happy…)

When is your next drop going to be?
When we feel like it. Life is hard, count yourself lucky that I got off my ass to write this in the first place…I mean, technically I am on my ass…I have a standing desk but I bought a really tall chair so I don’t need to stand at it when I don’t want to. The point is some might consider me lazy, but with the right inspiration we will shit rainbows onto some fiber stuff and make sure you get to see it (but not actual shit…you know what I mean).

Who hurt you?
I started writing a list but then I hit the character limit on the website and decided it best not to air my sexy laundry. Suffice to say, enough people to bring us here but not enough to break us (please don’t break us).

I hate you! This is offensive! Fiber arts shouldn’t be subversive or political!
What the fuck is wrong with you? Firstly you came to this site of your own free will! Hell, you even had to put a password in here! No one forced you to look at our site (unless you are being held hostage in some Clockwork Orange type nightmare, at which point I’d say blink twice for help, but you can’t so I will just laugh at you). SECOND, fiber arts / textiles have always been subversive and political! Shit, just take a look a how controversial the concept of POCKETS are throughout history. Third, with all the hunger, abuse, and crime going on in the world today are you going to seriously get up in arms about a website with a few naughty words? Get a fucking life.

Can I tell my friend / parent / spouse / favorite podcaster / boss / president / supreme leader about this site?
It’s a free country (at least they told us we are in one), so do what you want, just remember, whomever you share this site with is going to blame you for it.

How can I trust that you will deliver?
Part of this wonderful art project is the idea that maybe you can start to learn a little about how to trust again. Think about where you learned about this website…do you trust them? Do some serious critical analysis, background research, and then decide that’s too hard and just spend the money on one purchase to try us out. At worst you lose a couple of bucks and you make some scammers really happy. At best you’ve become a part of an exclusive club that supports secretly subversive dyers and you reward us for making you laugh / learn something.

I have a complaint/compliment/request, how can I contact you?
Please emails us at speakeasyjunk@gmail.com. Seriously, we check that email. Don’t believe me? Weren’t we just talking about trust here?

Wait, I thought this was a club. Where is the club aspect?
Meh, it’s more of a good name than an actual club. This is like one of those fan clubs where you get a membership card, you get on a mailing list, and you get fed information you can tell your friends at your next meetup so you can look clever and informed.

OH! So I get a membership card?
Fuck-it, sure. You can download a card in a bit…I’ll get one up soon.

How do I learn about your next drop?
How did you find out about this in the first place? Seriously! This is supposed to be secret! Well since you are here now you may as well sign up for announcements when we update.